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Every year, retailers lose $45 billion
to shoplifting. It's the job of loss

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prevention officers to protect against
these shoplifters.

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These are their stories, only at
shoplifter .com.

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All right, got it, David. Get in there.

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You know why you're here?

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Yeah.

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For this, right?

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Yeah.

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Oh, that was easy.

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All right, well, young lady, why don't
you sit down and be there.

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I'm going to pack some paperwork and
stuff like that, and I'll be right back.

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What's with the smile, young lady?

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I don't know.

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You shouldn't be smiling if you've just
been caught shopping.

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I'm going to need some information from
you.

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Like what?

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Do you have an ID on you?

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No, I don't.

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All right.

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First, give me your height.

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My height? 5 '5". Weight?

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110 pounds.

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20. What's your name and address on
there?

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It's a long address. Where do you live?

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I live down the street from here.

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Let's fuck. That's very appropriate,
young lady.

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Write down the goddamn address.

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There. Anything else you need?

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Fuck me in the ass, fuck me hard.

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All right, God damn it, young lady.

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You better think about what you did. I'm
going to be back in five minutes to let

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you get your act together.

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I'll be here.

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I would love to be spanked with this.

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Hey, goddammit, stop touching my belts.

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Why don't you spank me with one of them?
Hey!

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Watch your tongue, young lady.

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I don't want you fucking with me
anymore.

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Are you under the influence of any drugs
or alcohol?

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No, I'm not.

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Sure about that?

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Sober as can be.

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Were you recently committed to any
mental hospitals?

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Were you?

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Did you escape from him at the
Institute?

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No. Okay.

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Do you have a history of cultomania?

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Not really.

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But, you know, I know the drill around
here.

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Well, if you're familiar with this,
please stand up. Let's take a mug shot.

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Alright. All right, I'll reinstall.

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See?

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Do you know how much that bracelet was
worth?

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Necklace?

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Um, I don't know, maybe like a hundred
dollars?

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It's more than that, young lady.

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It's over 900, in fact.

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How'd you even get that thing?

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It just ended up in my pocket.

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I'm going to review the security
footage.

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As a matter of fact, why don't I just go
do that now?

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I don't know why you keep smiling.

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I don't think you understand how serious
this is.

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The item which you stole was at least
over $900, which in this state is a

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felony.

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It's not a misdemeanor, it's a felony.

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And that can land you some serious jail
time.

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Well, isn't there anything I can do to
not go to jail?

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Yeah, you can have cooperation.

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We'll get this investigation done, and
we'll have you hand over to the cops in

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no time.

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So you get additional information, run
your name.

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I would really not like to go to jail.

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If there's anything I can do, you know.
Write your name down one more time,

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young lady.

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No shenanigans.

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What is your problem?

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What is your problem?

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Do you always write inappropriate things
on paper?

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You have no form of ID?

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I have no ID on me. I mean, you can
search me and see for yourself.

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Do you have any other stolen items on
you?

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Any weapons or needles in your pockets?
Nope.

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Anything you could poke me?

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No, nothing.

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Okay, have a seat.

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Do you have anything in your shoes that
you're hiding?

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No. Okay.

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One more time. One last time.

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Write your name down.

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What did you write, Come Down, Sir 2000?

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Okay.

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One more time here after the crash.

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That's how I'm gonna watch you.

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Okay.

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Thank you. Now run your name. It better
not be a fake name.

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It's definitely my name.

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Alright, scanned your record.

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You seem to have no priors whatsoever.

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You seem to not recognize the severity
of your crime.

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Why would you even do this?

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Well, I know the drill around here.

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Yeah, you go, you get caught, you go to
jail. Very simple drill. It goes all

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over the nation, all 50 states.

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That's not what... the other girl told
me.

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Okay.

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I mean, I think you know what I'm
talking about.

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No, young lady, actually I don't.

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It's really, really surprising because
I've heard it happen multiple times.

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I mean, just why I stole it in the first
place.

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I thought you...

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go to jail i don't understand you get a
ticket what

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you know any criminals i have here daily
you're not the first one probably won't

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be the last either exactly i mean like i
said i know the drill around here so

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okay

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so then you know maybe you need to
search me a little better

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Do you have any more hidden items on
you?

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I mean, like I said, why don't you see
for yourself?

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Goddamn, stand up again.

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Take off the switch.

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All right, remove your clothes up.

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Hmm, thought you'd never ask.

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What is your malfunction?

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Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

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A little bit too liberal over there.

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You have some sort of malfunction, lady?

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Me? Malfunction?

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Don't you wear bras and panties?

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I have panties all over.

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Jesus.

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Almost with you girls nowadays.

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So liberal with your bodies.

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Throwing your boobs all over the place.

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Can you hand me those, please?

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Up there, right?

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Okay.

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There's no atoms here.

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By visual inspection, there are no atoms
on you. Mm -hmm.

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All right, we're going to be right back.

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You get dressed, and then we'll have to
continue our conversation.

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Do I really have to get dressed?

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God damn it.

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What is your malfunction, young lady?

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I told you to get dressed.

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All your clothes on. I don't know what
you're doing.

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I know what goes on around here.

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I don't know why you're telling me to
get dressed.

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Okay. I don't know what you mean, what
goes on here, young lady.

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I keep telling you over and over and
over again.

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What the other girl told me happened.
Who's the other girl? Who are you

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about? I don't know. She got in trouble
today.

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Okay, and?

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Well, I know that security guards here
have a very interesting way of punishing

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the girls.

155
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Yeah, we take them to jail, we proc
them, hear them, they go to jail. What's

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problem?

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I don't want to go to jail, though.

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There has to be something I can do
instead.

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Oh, I know what you're talking about.

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Let's go ahead and help us organize her.

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Tax forms, but she didn't steal anything
over $900 so you can do that but you

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committed a felony so You're gonna have
to

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With

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what money you got nothing on you search
the

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entire time you can like Call your mom
and she's gonna say oh, yeah, I caught

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you got caught shoplifting

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I don't think she... I mean, I'm sure we
can work something out.

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Something more. Okay,

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for the necklace, I can do the tax
filing thing for

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you.

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Are you going to qualify for taxes?

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I don't think so.

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I know

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about... you guys do here who put you up
to this this is the kind of joke

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it's not a joke it's all me just me this
officer small big

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guy english accent he put you up to this
i don't know who that is

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i mean so english guy yeah the girl told
me what happened

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so

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I thought that maybe if I stole
something, then I would get the same

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But, I mean, maybe I, maybe this is the
wrong place. So,

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I mean, I'm sure you know what

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I'm talking about.

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And it can just be between me and you.

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Go ahead.

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Is this where you got caught?

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Mm -hmm.

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There you go.

188
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I'll tell you what. If you do a good
job, then I'll come home with you.

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Careful there.

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And you do it again.

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Keep going.

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You really want to get caught showing
enthusiasm.

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Come on.

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Show me that I'm not wasting my time. I
can just make one phone call and send

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you home.

196
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Just be a little slut or something.

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Is that why you're here?

198
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So far down you can go.

199
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So far down.

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That's it. Let's look at a lot more deep
lift.

201
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Is that the way you like it, huh?

202
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I'm going to go to sleep.

203
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I'm going to sleep.

204
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Is that a camera right there?

205
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Blah, blah, blah.

206
00:54:22,050 --> 00:54:23,390
What the fuck?

207
00:54:24,350 --> 00:54:25,370
Don't come back.

208
00:54:30,390 --> 00:54:34,110
Every year, retailers lose $45 billion
to shoplifting.

209
00:54:34,410 --> 00:54:38,730
It's the job of loss prevention officers
to protect against these shoplifters.

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00:54:39,070 --> 00:54:40,710
These are their stories.